150. Four Things That Make You Mentally Weak

Speaker: 00:00:03

is simply just not enough time in

the day to get everything done.

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And honestly, there's so

many task lists that I have.

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And I literally can't get through

even one of them in a day.

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I truly do not have

enough time in the day.

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24 hours is not enough.

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Maybe if I didn't have to sleep, I

could actually get everything done.

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But even then, who knows if

that would actually work?

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Does this sound like you, do you feel

like you do not have enough time in

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the day to get everything that you need

or even want to get done in the day?

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If this is you, it is likely that you

have an issue with your time management

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and you probably have outsourced a lot

of your attention to things that do not

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deserve your attention, or at least.

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The amount of attention that

you are giving to those things.

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So in today's episode, we're going

to cover four things that are making

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us mentally weak in the modern day.

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And I'm going to also provide a

few tips on how we can combat these

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things so that we can regain control

of our time, our attention, and

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ultimately become mentally stronger.

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I am your host, Evan Roberts.

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And this is the elemental Evan podcast.

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Where I break down.

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Complex health topics from

a holistic perspective.

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So let's just go ahead and jump in to

the very first one, which is going to be.

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Social media and yes, I'm

jumping right into the deep end.

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Um, I'm also going to include our

phones in this because our phones do

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have certain like video games on them.

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And don't get me wrong.

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I love social media.

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I use it myself as well.

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Um, I don't think it is 100% bad.

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I don't think it's the

devil or anything like that.

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Um, but I do think that we are

very inefficient with how we use

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it and we are honestly not even

conscious of how much we use it.

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And I think that's where the real

issue lies, but I think it's really

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important for us to understand that.

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These companies are working day and night

to literally figure out what is the most

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effective way to grab your attention.

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And then to entrap your attention and keep

it there for literally hours in a day.

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It is wild.

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How much time we spend on social

media and how much of our.

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Attention, we just literally give to it.

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And we don't even think about how much

attention and energy we're giving to it.

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But.

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Our energy and our attention is literally

like a universal currency, right?

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It is what these companies

are fighting for is what

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they're working to try to grab.

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And it is literally money,

our attention or energy.

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It is money for them.

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So.

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Of course, they are going to be

doing their best to make these

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apps as addictive as possible.

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And like I said, there are some good

things about these apps and I personally

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love using them for things like keeping

in touch with people and, you know, seeing

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some really amazing photos and videos.

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Of course.

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Uh, but nonetheless, we have to be very

conscious and aware of the amount of time

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that we're spending on these social media.

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Uh, applications.

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I personally feel that the best

way to handle social media and

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the time usage that we spend on

these is to set some very strong.

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Boundaries or guidelines

around our time usage on them,

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because how many of you have.

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Pulled out your phone and before

you even know it, you're already

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in a social media app, scrolling

through , videos and photos.

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My hand is up in the air.

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And I know none of you can see that,

but that's because I'm in that boat.

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I literally have pulled out my phone

and without even paying any mind to

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it, I click on the Instagram app.

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And the next thing I know I'm scrolling

through, you know, stories or photos

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or videos or whatever it may be.

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And I had no intention of going

on my phone for that purpose.

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I've even had it to the point where

I would wake up in the morning.

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And one of the first things I would do,

or even the first thing that I would do is

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open up my phone and look at social media.

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Hop on Instagram, check out

what's going on on there.

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And it is just not a good thing to do.

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Right.

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We are losing our willpower in choosing

where we spend our attention and give

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our energy because that is really

one of the few things that we truly.

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Own in this life and we have

full autonomy over right.

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So why should we just.

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Give it out to anyone.

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Uh, that can simply grab

our attention, right?

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We should be actively choosing

where and how we give our

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attention and spend our time.

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So with social media, I personally

find that setting some really clear

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guidelines and time restrictions

around social media is absolutely key

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for gaining control of, you know, not

outsourcing your attention and just

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letting it go, uh, to social media.

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So what I usually do is I have a

general guideline where I just do not

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use social media during the morning.

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So usually 30 minutes to an hour after

waking up, I am not on social media.

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I do not like waking up and just becoming

reactionary to whatever might pop up

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on Instagram, whether it's good or bad.

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I don't really care.

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I personally would like to be the

person who sets the tone for the

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day, you know, actively choosing

to, you know, start my day off.

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Right.

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So definitely not using social media.

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First thing in the morning

is going to be a great idea.

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And then if you are a person who is

really addicted to social media and

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you have to start finding a way to

get away from there and reclaiming

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some of your time and attention.

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Then I would definitely recommend

setting some very hard start

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and stop times to social media.

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So let's say you're giving yourself

from three to four o'clock in the

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afternoon to use social media.

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That means that at three o'clock

you could hop on social media and

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all the way up to four o'clock.

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You could literally just mindlessly

scroll through whatever it may be

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up until four o'clock, but at four

o'clock you have to get off no matter

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what, no matter how good the video

is, no matter whatever it may be.

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That's going on.

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You have to put that phone down

and get off of social media.

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By setting those clear guidelines.

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It doesn't allow for there to

be any gray area where, you

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know, the video was so good.

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So you might as well continue watching it.

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There's only like a minute left on it.

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And then all of a sudden what ends

up happening as you go on there

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for another 20 minutes, you know?

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And then you just get

caught up in that cycle.

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So setting really clear time

guidelines is going to be crucial here.

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Now, if you are pretty good with

your social media usage as is.

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Then first off, kudos.

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But second off, if you.

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Are pretty good with your social

media usage, then maybe just set some

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guidelines around the use of social media.

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Like, you know, not using it

in the morning, not using it

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when you're eating a meal.

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So that way you can be present with

the food and with the company, um, you

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know, maybe not using it when you're

supposed to be out on a date, right?

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Like the things where we should be giving

our full attention to the present moment.

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Uh, setting some guidelines around

that can be really beneficial.

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Now number two is going to be

relying on TV and I'm going to

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throw the phone in there as well as

our only source of entertainment.

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So.

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I know that there are some

incredible TV shows and movies

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out there and don't get me wrong.

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I absolutely love to watch them.

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But how many times have you thrown

on the TV for a little bit of

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background noise and all of a sudden

your favorite TV show is on that.

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You've literally seen like a million

times, and yet you still just go and sit

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down and you get a little caught up in the

TV show and all of a sudden, now you've

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wasted another hour or two hours watching

the show that you've already seen.

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And it's just a rerun, right?

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Like this is something that

has definitely happened to me.

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And it's happened to a lot of people.

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That I know I've seen, I've seen it

literally happened to other people.

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Um, so once again it is.

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The inability of us to really control

where and how we give our attention right.

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Where we spend our time.

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So reclaiming that power

is going to be huge.

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And one of the ways of doing that is.

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Before you sit down.

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To watch TV.

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Once again, you could

set a time limit here.

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You could say, Hey, I'm going

to watch TV for the next hour.

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And you know, at four o'clock on the

dot, I am getting up, I'm turning

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off this TV and I'm going back to

work or doing whatever it may be.

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You could do it that way, or you

could also pick a show, right?

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And don't get me wrong.

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I mean, I know.

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Picking a show is probably very

time consuming in and of itself.

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Uh, but nonetheless, if you have a show

that, you know, you want to watch, you

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can just say, Hey, like, I'm going to

watch one, maybe two episodes of the show.

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And then after that I'm turning off

the TV and getting on with my life and

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doing other things, because there are

tons of other ways to find entertainment

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that do not involve using a TV or

even your phone for that matter.

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One of my favorite ways.

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Is a good old fashioned book.

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And I know maybe books are out of style.

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I don't know.

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But, um, there is so much knowledge in

books and the time that you spend reading.

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Gives you back so much, right?

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It gives you so much knowledge

that you can apply to your life and

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actually use in day-to-day experiences.

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And don't get me wrong.

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Of course.

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I know when you watch a show, you

can go ahead and, you know, have good

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conversations with people about that show.

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I understand that there is

a connection there, but.

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Truthfully reading a book

is just so powerful and you

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can get so much out of it.

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Plus there's tons of board games.

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Um, you could go outside, do something

physical, which is going to be so much

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better for your mind and your body.

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And that also will help keep you

mentally strong by getting out and

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doing something physically demanding.

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That's going to help build that

mental strength and mental resilience.

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Now.

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The third thing that is.

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Making us mentally weak is our food.

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And I'm going to also

throw in there, sleep.

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Food and sleep are huge for our

mental strength and fortitude.

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So when it comes to our food, If

you are eating foods that are highly

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processed or ultra processed, which

if you eat the standard American

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diet, which is abbreviated as sad and.

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Yeah, it's a pretty fitting name

because it means that you're eating.

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I believe it's somewhere around 60%

of all of your food in a processed

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food form, which is really truly sad.

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So when you're eating food, that

is deficient of these nutrients.

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You are literally doing your body a

disservice, you're making it so much

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more difficult to make these decisions.

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Your.

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Basically giving yourself the okay to

give in to the easier things in life.

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Because when you eat these ultra

processed foods, what happens,

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you typically feel super groggy.

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You feel lazy, you feel like you

need to go take a nap even, and this

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can last for like an hour or two or

three hours after eating these foods.

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So what are you more likely to

do after eating these foods?

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Well, you're probably more likely to

sit down and scroll on your phone or

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watch TV or do something along those

lines as opposed to going outside and

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playing sport or doing something active.

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Right.

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The food that you're eating is going to

play a role in not only the development

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of your body, but also your mind and it's

the functioning of your mind as well.

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Right.

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And the ability to make these

harder decisions, instead

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of just giving into these.

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You know, short, uh, short

term enjoyments, but with

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no long-term benefit, right.

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So food is absolutely crucial

to building mental strength and

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when it comes to sleep as well.

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I mean, it does not take a

doctor to understand that even

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just one night of bad sleep.

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Could lead you down this path of,

for one feeling super irritable,

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number two, just feeling tired

throughout the rest of your day.

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Like you just want to go back to

bed and curl up in a ball and sleep.

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And number three, it's going to

make it a lot more difficult to

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make the hard decisions, right.

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Uh, even when you get a bad night of

sleep, you actually have higher levels of

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cravings for a lot of the foods that you

probably shouldn't be eating, which, uh,

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definitely a sugar is in that category.

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So having one bad night of sleep

can make it all the more difficult

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to make the difficult decisions.

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And it's going to make you want to,

once again, do the easy thing it's

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gonna make you want to just kind of

coast through the day it's going to

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make you want to, you know, just hop on

social media and mindlessly scroll and

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just kind of do the easy stuff, right.

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Which if you want to live a great

life, you got to do the hard things.

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The hard things are what make us better.

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Uh, so it's important for us to

keep that mental strength up.

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And the few ways to do so are

improving our food and improving

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our sleep and ways in which you can

improve your food is to just focus

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on eating foods that are whole foods.

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They come.

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You know, from the closest

form to the earth as possible.

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So literally vegetables,

high quality meats.

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If you eat meat, Fruits.

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, nuts as well these are the things that

we really want to focus on eating and

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really move away from the Oreos and the

sour gummy worms and the Ritz crackers.

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We want to move away from those things

and really focus on the foods that

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are going to nourish our body and give

us the correct nutrients to function

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properly and be able to make those

decisions that we know are going to

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be better for us in the longterm.

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And then in terms of sleep.

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The best things I can recommend.

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Number one, stop eating

so close to bedtime.

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Give yourself at least two to four

hours before you go to bed where

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you are not eating any food at all.

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Uh, you can have water.

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You can, you know, for the most part,

have some liquids, as long as it's

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not really, uh, something that you

have to digest, uh, very heavily.

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But pretty much just stick to water.

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Two to four hours before you

go to bed, that's going to

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help massively with your sleep.

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Uh, keep your room as dark as possible.

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And if you are up for it,

try some mouth taping.

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And I know that sounds weird, but trust

me, there is a lot of benefit in it.

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I try to mouth tape as much as

possible when I go to bed and it

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is super beneficial for your sleep.

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It is also good for your

mouth microbiome as well.

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So.

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Go ahead and give that a try.

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And then last but not least.

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We do not spend enough time being

essentially bored or not entertained.

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So in today's world, . It's

actually almost hard to not

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be entertained in some way.

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Right?

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If you're in a car, you probably

have music on or a podcast,

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which don't get me wrong.

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That's where I listen to

most of my podcasts as well.

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But.

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. I mean, even when you go to the bathroom,

it's probably very likely that you are

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also taking your phone to the bathroom

because it is not entertaining enough

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to just be in the bathroom alone.

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Using the restroom.

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We also have to have our phones with

us to accompany us to the bathroom.

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Uh, so it is very difficult for us

to, in a sense, be bored, right?

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I mean, if you've ever been in a waiting

room and just looked around the office

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at the people sitting in the chairs,

Uh, majority of the people are going

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to be sitting there on their phone.

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Right.

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They're going to be entertaining

themselves in one way or another,

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which, you know, two degree,

there's nothing bad with that.

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But when we literally spend.

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Practically our entire days

being entertained or just

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giving our attention away.

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And allowing our minds to just run all

day long and just keeping them occupied.

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We never give ourselves the opportunity

to just simply sit with our mind

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and actually try to practice a

little bit of mental control here.

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Right?

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Our mind can be a muscle as well

in terms of, uh, how we use it.

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You know, when we have these

thoughts that are constantly running

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through our mind all day long.

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We can practice on.

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You know, How these

thoughts affect our day.

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Like if we even care to listen

to these thoughts, right?

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Like these are things that you can

practice and get better at, but

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they do take time and they also

require us to get a little bit bored

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or, uh, maybe not even bored, but

rather just quiet with ourselves.

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And so one of the best

ways that I have found to.

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Really control the mind and

flex that muscle, right.

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That mind, muscle and build

true mental strength of.

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You know, not being reactionary

to our thoughts, not allowing

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our thoughts to just control how

we show up in the world today.

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You know, but actually actively choosing

what thoughts we allow into our mind

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and, you know, allowing us to observe.

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Our surroundings and respond incentive,

just react to everything that is

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going on in our external environment.

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And, you know, allowing the first

thought that comes to our mind, uh, be

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the first thing that we say or do right.

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So.

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What I would highly recommend is

developing a meditation practice or

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: 00:18:02

even just a mindfulness practice, or

if you don't want to do any of those,

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just even get bored, just get away

from being distracted all the time

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: 00:18:11

and just allow your mind to be bored.

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These are very powerful

practices, especially meditation.

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Meditation is one of my favorite practices

and truly you can develop the strength of.

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: 00:18:25

Watching the thoughts come into your mind.

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Right.

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: 00:18:28

And actually being aware of the thoughts

that are coming into your mind instead

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: 00:18:31

of just allowing them to happen.

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: 00:18:33

And, you know, just allowing

your mind to run all day long.

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: 00:18:37

Throwing these different

random thoughts in your mind?

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: 00:18:39

Uh, Yeah, in your mind.

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: 00:18:40

And, and, uh, of course that's a job,

but there's a lot of really pointless

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thoughts that we have every single day.

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: 00:18:48

And, and I know there's a

number, it's something like.

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: 00:18:50

90% of our thoughts that we have our

reoccurring thoughts every single day.

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: 00:18:54

And there's only like 10% of our

thoughts or even the less, I think

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that are actually new thoughts.

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: 00:18:59

So a lot of the stuff that you're thinking

is not a new revolutionary thought.

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: 00:19:04

Something you've already

pondered in your mind before.

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: 00:19:07

And so when you take some time to

sit down and actually be quiet and

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: 00:19:11

still with yourself, You can become

aware of these thoughts as they arise.

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: 00:19:15

And then you can also choose to

entertain those thoughts, or you could

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: 00:19:18

choose to allow those thoughts to pass.

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: 00:19:20

And this is literally flexing that muscle.

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: 00:19:23

It is a mental workout.

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: 00:19:25

And when you do this, your

developing the strength to.

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: 00:19:29

Choose where you give

your attention to, right?

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: 00:19:31

Because if a thought arises and you

give your attention to it, or you

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: 00:19:35

just naturally allow your attention

to be absorbed in that thought.

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: 00:19:40

Well, you're giving.

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: 00:19:42

That thought all the power.

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: 00:19:43

Right.

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: 00:19:43

But if you can choose to take your

attention away from that thought.

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: 00:19:47

Once again, we're

flexing that muscle here.

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: 00:19:49

Right?

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: 00:19:49

So it's the same thing with social media.

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: 00:19:51

Instead of allowing social media to

just automatically grab your attention.

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: 00:19:54

You can actively choose to use

social media or not use social media.

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: 00:20:00

And so meditation can be a really

incredible practice for developing

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: 00:20:04

some mental strength and fortitude

here and really taking back

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: 00:20:08

control of our willpower and our

self-control of, of, uh, really.

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: 00:20:13

You know, Allowing like social media

and television and all of these other

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: 00:20:18

forms of entertainment to kind of

just control how we spend our time.

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: 00:20:22

Right.

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: 00:20:23

I mean, there's so many days that

I have lost hours to entertainment

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: 00:20:27

that was literally mindless.

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: 00:20:30

Gave me nothing back in return, except

for maybe a few chuckles here and there.

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: 00:20:34

Right.

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: 00:20:35

Whereas I could have been spending

that time, reading a book or,

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: 00:20:38

you know, even working on this

podcast or whatever it may be.

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: 00:20:41

There are so many other things

that I could have been doing.

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: 00:20:43

So.

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: 00:20:44

Meditation is huge.

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: 00:20:46

And I have seen firsthand the

benefits of doing meditation, a

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: 00:20:50

regular meditation practice for one.

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: 00:20:53

It helps out with stress, but

obviously the big thing here is

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: 00:20:56

it really strengthens our mind

and we're flexing that muscle.

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: 00:21:01

So those are going to be the four things

that are making you mentally weak.

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: 00:21:07

And of course there are

many other things out there.

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: 00:21:10

But these are four of the really big

ones, in my opinion, and things that I

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: 00:21:15

think we need to become more aware of.

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: 00:21:16

And of course you can see that there was

a common theme here, which is essentially

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: 00:21:20

just taking back control of our time and

our attention, and be more aware of how

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: 00:21:26

we're spending our time and attention.

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: 00:21:28

And really one of the best ways of making

sure that we're more disciplined is

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: 00:21:32

by setting some really hard guidelines

and some time restrictions on.

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: 00:21:38

You know how often we use social

media or watch the television.

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: 00:21:44

So once again, I love to kind of just

go over and give a brief overview

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: 00:21:49

of the episode here at the end.

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: 00:21:50

So you can have some, uh, major key

takeaways and, uh, things that you

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: 00:21:54

can implement into your life today.

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: 00:21:56

So first off, the number

one thing that is.

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: 00:22:00

Making us mentally weak is in

my opinion, social media and

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: 00:22:05

basically our phone in general.

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: 00:22:07

Right?

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: 00:22:07

Because those also have some

little games on there that we can

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: 00:22:10

play and crush a ton of our time.

404

: 00:22:13

On these.

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: 00:22:14

Uh, different, uh, social

media apps and on our phones.

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: 00:22:19

And then number two is going to be

relying on TV and our phones for

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: 00:22:23

our only form of entertainment.

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: 00:22:25

Uh, and then number three is

going to be food and sleep.

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: 00:22:28

Getting poor food and poor sleep is going

to be detrimental to our mental strength.

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: 00:22:35

And doing the opposite, getting

good food and good sleep is

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: 00:22:38

going to really bolster our.

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: 00:22:41

Um, our mental strength and make us.

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: 00:22:43

Uh, much more equipped to

make the difficult decisions.

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: 00:22:47

And then number four.

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: 00:22:49

We are not bored enough or rather we are

not still and quiet with ourselves enough.

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: 00:22:57

And that is something that we definitely

need to do in order to really build our

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: 00:23:01

mental strength is we need to become

more aware of how we spend our time

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: 00:23:07

and where we allow our attention to go.

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: 00:23:09

So when we become more conscious

of that, and we can actually choose

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: 00:23:13

where we want to place our attention.

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: 00:23:15

That is when you begin to

build that mental strength.

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: 00:23:18

And then become the best version

of yourself possible that is

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: 00:23:22

in total control of their time.

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: 00:23:24

And they have all the willpower in

the world to say that, you know what?

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: 00:23:28

I don't want to waste my

time and spend my attention.

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: 00:23:32

On social media for a full hour today,

you know, instead I'm just gonna use

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: 00:23:37

it for a little bit, or I'm only gonna

use it in the guidelines that I've set.

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: 00:23:41

So anyways, y'all, that is

going to do it for today.

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: 00:23:44

Um, I really believe this

is an important episode.

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: 00:23:48

Uh, we really do waste a lot of our

time on things that don't deserve it.

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: 00:23:53

And personally, I think.

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: 00:23:55

It's one of the few things that we

have in this world, like I said,

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: 00:23:58

full autonomy over, and that is our

time and the choices that we make.

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: 00:24:02

So, uh, let's go ahead and take

that power back in our hands so

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: 00:24:05

that we can make the best decisions.

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: 00:24:07

Uh, for ourselves so that we

can live our best life ever.

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: 00:24:11

I really appreciate you all

tuning in today, please.

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: 00:24:14

If you haven't already subscribed to

this podcast on whatever platform you're

439

: 00:24:18

on and share this episode with someone

who could benefit from hearing this, or

440

: 00:24:23

could benefit from hearing the show in

your podcast application, you can very

441

: 00:24:28

simply go in there and send a message

to someone with this episode in it.

442

: 00:24:33

Uh, very easily from

your podcast application.

443

: 00:24:37

And if you're on.

444

: 00:24:38

Uh, apple podcast.

445

: 00:24:40

And please go ahead and

leave a written review.

446

: 00:24:42

I would love to see that and hear it.

447

: 00:24:44

I always read all of those and honestly,

it's just super cool to see what kind

448

: 00:24:48

of takeaways you have from the show.

449

: 00:24:50

And yeah.

450

: 00:24:51

So share this with a friend, family

loved one, whoever needs to hear it.

451

: 00:24:55

And if you want to share this on social

media as well, I would love to see that.

452

: 00:24:59

Go ahead and tag me on there as well.

453

: 00:25:00

So I can go ahead and reshare your post.

454

: 00:25:03

And y'all, if you haven't listened to

this show before I have a motto, and

455

: 00:25:07

that is to do everything with good

intentions and connect to your elements.

456

: 00:25:15

I appreciate the

listenership show so much.

457

: 00:25:17

I hope you all have a beautiful

rest of your day and I will

458

: 00:25:20

see you on next week's episode.

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: 00:25:23

RDL piece, have a good one.